I often wonder why as humans we make excuses, usually the excuse is totally nonsensical, yet we still do it, why? The person we are telling the excuse to generally knows and are just too polite to call us on it, and yet we can’t seem to help ourselves.
We use excuses to justify a behaviour that we don’t want to own, because we are afraid of what someone will think of us, or we don’t want to hurt someone by telling the truth.
- Is your father in law responsible for you putting that food in your mouth?
- Is your job responsible for you going home and cracking a bottle of wine?
- Is your family responsible for you not managing your time?
- Is not having enough time in your day really the reason you neglect your health?
- Sorry I am busy that night/day/afternoon/week/year!
I think you get the picture and I am sure can add a few of your own tried and tested excuses to the ones above.
The first step towards change is owning your behaviour. As humans for some bizarre reason as we get older we fear change and what it will bring. We would rather stay stuck in a crappy situation or make an excuse before making even the smallest of changes. We fear the opinion of others.
The truth is we are sovereign beings with free will. If we didn’t adapt and embrace change we would all be in our cots wearing nappies. Therefore change is good.
So how do you stop using excuses? The first step is to own your excuse:
Number 1 above. Stop what you are saying, and own it. A simple you know what, that is just an excuse and we both know it. The truth is I wanted to eat junk food. I chose to eat and I chose to neglect my health. I acknowledge that no one else is responsible but me.
Number 5 above. Sorry I have no interest in bowling/hiking/that movie etc, or whatever the request or invitation is, I just want a night in. Be honest, if the other person cannot deal with your honesty that is actually their issue not yours.
Start owning your actions and stop making excuses, and if you find yourself making up an excuse, stop and correct. You will be delighted by the changes you start to see and experience.
Have a great day.
Deb
