As promised last week, here is my take on a strong woman.

Guys from my own personal experience I have found that this generally does not pertain to you. Sadly I have found that it is mainly women who this applies to.  There is a perception at times that a strong woman is arrogant, aggressive and bitchy, particularly in the workplace when they make tough decisions, take a stance or do not allow themselves to be manipulated. And also at home if they manage the finances, coordinate trades and generally manage the household.

A strong woman has learnt not to allow others to take advantage of them. Strong women will move heaven and earth to follow their convictions and live life by the values and choices that they want for themselves, regardless of what others think or say.

A strong woman will not allow herself to be manipulated to another’s purpose. A strong woman is resolute in her beliefs, loyal, reliable, trustworthy, and sensitive to others needs.

Whilst a strong woman will not allow herself to be manipulated, she will endeavour to find a compromise. Whether others choose to accept this compromise is their choice. A strong woman will nurture strength, courage and goodness in herself and others. A strong woman allows others to take the lead when needed, as she doesn’t feel like she has to control everything, or be right all the time.

A strong woman is happy with herself and doesn’t feel she has to hide behind a facade or mask. She can be vulnerable at times and will ask for help if necessary, she knows she cannot do it all. A strong woman will learn from her mistakes and will move forward in life with dignity and grace. A strong woman, if you allow yourself, can be someone that you can rely on and trust, because she is authentic.

So embrace a strong woman, don’t be intimidated or let your ‘confusion’ label her, we have enough labels in this world. And if you are a strong woman in hiding, embrace your true self.

Deb

You often read articles talking about how a strong woman is often perceived as aggressive a bit of a bitch – don’t worry ladies I will touch on this next week. But I thought it about time that we had a chat about the modern man.

Is the modern man really different at his core than his predecessor? A modern man is generally perceived as more: sensitive, empathetic, caring, conscious of their appearance etc, and yes they do cry and eat quiche. Is this new or have they always been this way, but with a façade to ensure that they live up to the labels and expectations put on them by society, at any given time?

I would hazard a guess that men have always been: sensitive, caring, empathetic and concerned about their appearance etc. (let’s face it the male in most other species is generally more colourful and pretty) but that it was not socially acceptable for them to be authentic. It was not considered manly. So I believe real men hid their true selves, and lived behind a mask so that they could live up to society’s expectations of them, and be accepted into this world in which they were born.

How refreshing it must be for the modern man to be true to oneself and cry if there is a need or it feels right, eat quiche out at a café without being judged, be sensitive and caring, particularly to another man. And I applaud those men who are true to how they feel and do not pretend to be something that they are not. I much prefer people to be honest with who they are, at least that way there are no surprises – what you see is what you get, not to mention I also make a pretty good quiche. I also believe it takes real courage and strength to step outside those societal labels.

Why is it that we cling to these old stereotypes, does it make us comfortable or allow us to explain away behaviour? But truly who are we to judge what is right or normal for another person? Isn’t it time that we allowed people to show us their true self and be grateful for this? I say yes.

So bring on the modern man, the man who has always been the same but has removed the pretence. Truth be told we women like it, we love seeing the real authentic you, whether a friend, colleague or lover. It gives us the same freedom to drop our labels and be our true authentic selves. Thank you.

Deb