Solutions By Debbie Lanyon

Clinical Hypnotherapy & Life Coaching

Kindness

Kindness

 

Kindness (noun)

…the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate.

Most of us would like to believe that we are kind, but for me kindness is connected to mindfulness, you have to actively experience it to truly understand how impactful it can be. Rather than a passing act, eg donating clothes to charity rather than putting in the bin. Putting the old couch on the roadside (hoping that someone will take it rather than taking to the dump) and then saying oh I gave it to someone in need.

Often we dismiss kindness as something we already do, some consider it a soft almost fluffy act, sometimes with little meaning and no real thought behind it.

Kindness connects us to others and once we go out of our way to be kind, or observe a random act of kindness; we can truly appreciate the full impact it can bring to someone’s life.

A mindful act of kindness could be seen as having a cost to ourselves, whether that be time or money. There needs to be thought and effort on our part. In the act of being kind our brains release chemicals in the form of serotonin, dopamine and oxytocin, similar to those released when we fall in love, hence we have that nice warm glow.

There is currently research being undertaken to determine if kindness is within our genes, to date three genes have potentially been identified. In time we may know why some people are naturally kind and some are not. Most importantly, kindness can be developed via mindfulness.

Examples of kindness,

…random or otherwise that you can engage in today:

  • Pay a compliment to a stranger
  • Take the time to talk to someone and really listen, someone you may normally avoid
  • Hold open a door
  • Pay for someone’s coffee
  • Leave flowers on someone’s desk
  • Hide a note for a loved one
  • Make someone their favourite meal for no reason
  • Let someone cut in line
  • Take a cake to work for no reason
  • If you call someone on a schedule eg Mum every Sunday at 10.00 am, call out of schedule
  • Send a personalised hand written letter to someone
  • Volunteer
  • Give blood if you are able
  • Tell someone you love them, just because

When you start to think about it the list is limitless. One I used to like doing before technology put a halt to it, was to pay the toll for the car behind me

What is something you like to do? Whatever it is mindfully do more, release those chemicals and feel good.

Have a great day.

Deb

Loving Yourself – 5 Benefits

Self Love

Loving yourself! It does not mean going to the extreme and becoming a narcissistic, but to love yourself as in accept everything about yourself, be happy in your skin, be confident in who you are.

There are some who feel that being in love with yourself means you are vain or conceited, that is not necessarily the case. You can be happy and love yourself without being vain, in fact that is one of the key elements in having love for yourself. I am sure you have heard the phrase “You can’t love others until you love yourself.” It’s a common phrase that has been said for years and it has truth behind it. When you have accepted and love yourself you are able to love others warts and all, it is easy, it is what we call unconditional love.

Another wonderful perk about loving yourself is that when you do, you don’t look for acceptance or approval from others; because you already have the confidence you need, and you know you are perfectly imperfect just the way you are.

I wish this concept was easy for people to understand, it’s sad to see people with self-esteem issues, if only loving yourself came as easy as degrading yourself. Next time you find yourself saying hurtful things about yourself, stop, assess and say something nice.

When you love yourself you not only feel better but look better, as you emit a beauty, a natural beauty. The other bonus to loving yourself is that you are more likely have a better family and home life; this is because once you learn to love yourself you are a happier person in general which leads to those around you being happier.

Benefits of Loving Yourself

  1. You can love others unconditionally
  2. You are not impacted by what others think of you
  3. You look and feel better
  4. You are easier to get along with
  5. People want to be around you

Loving yourself can have a ripple effect on those around you, and in the world at large. We all can use some positive vibes in our lives. It’s like when you fall in love everything in the world changes and things just seem better, more appealing, and more beautiful. The same can be said when you love yourself. Things change in the world, your outlook  and those around you. Now, this is a feeling and emotion worthy of sharing.

Deb

 

Be the positive change in your life™

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0433 299 079

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